Reflections On A Year In Full Time Ministry

I realised today that I have been serving God and the Methodist Church of Great Britain as a Probationer Presbyter for exactly a year; and was surprised by how quickly that year has gone and how much I have learned and changed over the past year.  To those of you who’ve been in active full time ministry for many years, if not decades, the passing of twelve months might seem fairly insignificant, but for me it marks a real milestone in my Christian journey.

I still remember how nervous I was as I sat here a year ago, thinking about the fact that the next day I officially started as a Probationer Presbyter, that from 1^st September 2012 I had pastoral oversight of four congregations; that the very next day I could receive a call from somebody whose loved one had just died and have to do a pastoral visit…..

I don’t know why I was worried.  I had several years’ experience as a Local Preacher and had just received two years excellent training and formation at Wesley Study Centre, St John’s College, Durham, including placement experience in several different areas of ministry.  I still felt strongly that God had called me to ordained ministry and knew that God would be with me, and yet the concern was still there.   I found myself reflecting on some words spoken by the Lancashire District Candidate’s Committee Secretary: “The medical profession is very careful about who they allow to become doctors because they care for people’s bodies.  The church must be even more careful about who they recognise as Presbyters and Deacons because they care for people’s souls!”

If I talk about even that first week in detail then this will be a very long piece.  Instead I’ll just briefly reflect on some of the highlights of my first year.

I remember the first service of Holy Communion I presided at, having received a dispensation from Conference.  It was at Bramhope Methodist Church and was also the very first service I did at the church.  I used Ordinary Seasons First Service from The Methodist Worship Book.  I was nervous because the previous Presbyter had worn cassock and stole when leading worship and I wondered how my attire of suit and clerical shirt would be received by the congregation.  Silly perhaps, but there you go.  In the event I has some very warm and positive feedback at the close of the service, with several commenting that they’d never had a minister like me before (I think it was a compliment).  Most of all I remember the moment of the epiclesis, what a very sacred moment for me it was, how strongly I felt the very presence of God.

My next first was my first funeral service, or Thanksgiving For and Celebration of Life Service, as I prefer to call them.  I was very nervous about the initial visit and prayed before leaving the Manse.  God was with me throughout that visit, guiding me and giving me the right words to say; as he has been with me through every visit since.

I remember my first Remembrance Day service at the war memorial in Bramhope.  I was, apparently, the first minister of any denomination to ask the gathered people to join with me in saying The Lord’s Prayer!

I’ll reflect on first Christmas and Easter in my next blog, but my next ministry first was a baptism.  This took place at Norwood Chapel and Retreat Centre in the beautiful Washburn Valley.  This was very, very special for me.  The baby behaved perfectly, not a tear in sight; she just sat in my arms and gazed into my eyes.  What a special privilege, to dedicate a new life to her God who will always love and care for her.

My next first was a Lambing Service.  This is a service in which a representative lamb is blessed on behalf of all the flocks in the area.  I held a week old lamb in my arms and as I prayed the prayer of blessing she nuzzled into my shoulder and licked my ear.  I haven’t eaten lamb since!

The final first of the year was a wedding in August.  In some ways I had looked forward to it and in other ways I hadn’t.  I was dreading filling in the registers and marriage certificate and making sure all the legal stuff was right.  I was looking forward to the actual service and preaching at a wedding.  I must have done something right because the couple asked me to be in two photographs.

There is a lot more stuff I could cover, but I’ll bring this to a close.  If you are a Probationer Presbyter or Deacon about to start your first year in Circuit then I pray that you will be as blessed as I have been, with supportive Circuit colleagues and congregations, with good friends to encourage you and by a God who is always with us.  You are about to embark on the best and finest vocation to which a human being can be called.  If you have been in ministry for many years I hope you still have that enthusiasm for serving God that you had then, or even that it has grown.

Most of you reading this won’t be Presbytyers, Deacons, Vicars, Priests in Charge or anything like that.  Be encouraged that whatever you do for God he will be with you, helping you, guiding you and empowering you!  I don’t just write this because it is in the Scriptures; I write it because I know it to be true.

Vestments - To Wear or Not to Wear, That is the Question!

Vestments – To Wear or Not to Wear, That is the Question

Until I went to study at Wesley Study Centre (WSC) I had never given the question of what a Presbyter should wear when leading worship serious consideration.  I had never thought about what I would wear when I started serving in Circuit as a Probationer Presbyter, partly because there seemed to me to be far more important things to think about!

To understand this you have to understand my Christian background.  I grew up, and spent most of my life worshipping in, a Methodist Church where vestments were not really worn.  The first minister I remember just wore a dark suit and clerical shirt when he took services, irrespective of the type of service.  His successor wore a black cassock with a plain black gown and preaching bands.  The next minister of the church wore what I now know to be a cassock alb; but was roundly mocked by some of the congregation for wearing what they all called ‘a monks robe’.  All the subsequent ministers wore suits and clerical shirts, without bands!

Despite a brief flirtation with Anglo-Catholicism when I was at Leeds University I naturally assumed that if I became a Probationer Presbyter I would wear a suit and black clerical shirt when taking church services.

Just before I left for WSC I was given a black gown, but couldn’t really foresee when I would actually wear it.

I was bemused at college, where Student Ministers from WSC studied and worshipped alongside Anglican Ordinands from Cranmer Hall, by the excitement of Anglican friends whenever one of the vestment companies visited college.  They would swarm over the cassocks and cassock albs with great enthusiasm, trying them on and adding various other bits and pieces, the names of which I can’t remember.  Some of them would even buy cassocks and wear them when leading morning or evening prayer or would don cassock albs for serving at Holy Communion services.  It all seemed to be very over the top and unnecessary to me.

The only thing that tempted me doesn’t come under the heading of vestments at all; and that was one of those marvelous Anglican cloaks that make the wearer, depending on height, look like either a hobbit or Count Dracula.  I will be getting one of those!

    

When I arrived in Circuit to start as a Probationer Presbyter I discovered that my predecessor had worn a cassock and stole for every service.  I decided they’d soon get used to the change and turned up for my first few Sundays at my largest church in a suit and black clerical shirt.  This seemed fine and I received no adverse comments.

Along came Remembrance Sunday and the service at the village War Memorial is one which is shared between the Methodists and Anglicans.  The British Legion came to see me about the public act of worship and made it clear they expected me to wear a cassock and were quite upset when I told them I didn’t have one. They looked happier when I said I’d compromise and wear the black robe.

I have subsequently worn that robe for every service of Holy Communion I have taken at my largest church and for every funeral service.  Comments receive indicate to me that it is much appreciated.  I don’t wear it at the three smaller chapels I serve because they have made it quite clear to me that they don’t like vestments of any kind; probably because they we all Primitive Methodists.  One of my Circuit colleagues who turned up in a cassock alb to preside at Communion was roundly and firmly told it was not acceptable to them!

I have another year as a Probationer Presbyter before, God (and the District Probationers Committee) willing, I will be ordained.  I have been doing a lot of thinking about vestments lately and wondered if I should, after all, consider whether or not to purchase and wear a cassock and/or cassock alb.  If I suddenly started wearing either now, after a year, it would look and seem odd, but ordination marks a natural moment for the change, if it is to be made.

I have already decided that after ordination I will start wearing preaching bands; and different coloured stoles to mark the liturgical seasons, but I’m still trying to decide if I should go all the way and wear a cassock and/or cassock alb at my largest church.

There are a number of considerations involved, not least of which is the fact that my wife really does object to me wearing what she calls ‘a dress’.  Is this a subject where I have to consider her opinion and feelings or do I lay them to one side if I feel it is right for me to wear a cassock or cassock alb?

A second consideration is why I would want to wear either a cassock or cassock alb.  It is certainly not for reasons of personal vanity or to try and set myself apart as something special.  That’s the last thing I want!  To my mind I think it is about, to a certain extent, subsuming my personality as identity so that I’m not so much seen as ‘Rick’ when I’m preaching or presiding at one of the sacraments, but as a Presbyter who is serving God as faithfully as I can and not doing so for any personal gain or glory.   I also think that appropriate vestments can add to the dignity of the worship of God, something lacking in some churches today.

This is something I’m still very much wrestling with.  Feedback will be very welcome and appreciated.

Christian Festivals - Am I Missing Something?

This is my first blog for a while, prompted by all the Tweets and Facebook statuses from people I know who are currently at Greenbelt and, a couple of weeks ago, from those attending the New Wine camp.  Thinking back, there were also a flurry of them around Easter, from Spring Harvest and ECG.

What promoted me to write entails something of a confession: with the exception of attending Greenbelt once, over 20 years ago, I have never been to a Christian festival, camp or other large event.

I sometimes wonder if I am impoverished as a Christian disciple and Probationer Presbyter in the Methodist Church because I don’t go along to these things.  Are they something I need to experience in order to give my best to the congregations I serve or can I serve just as well without going to them?

As I said, I did go to Greenbelt once, in the mid-1980s.  My main memories are that Cliff Richard was headlining and was far, far better than I thought he’d be; that the toilets (wooden benches with holes in them suspended over a deep pit) were probably the most disgusting thing I had ever encountered and that I was awfully glad to be sleeping in a caravan when the rain came down.  I came away from Greenbelt, despite my high expectations, feeling no different than when I’d arrived.  I certainly didn’t encounter God in any new or profound way.

And yet I keep on hearing about how great these festivals and big Christian gatherings are.  I hear from friends who have been to New Wine saying that their lives and ministries are transformed, friends who go back year after year.  I am told that I must go to the Keswick Convention to hear the solid evangelical preaching and be inspired.  I have friends who rave about Greenbelt and go back year after year after year.  Am I missing out on something?

Other friends tell me that I really don’t need to waste time and money attending the festivals and that there are much more cost effective ways of hearing some of the top Christian speakers and musicians they attract.  And it doesn’t involve sleeping in a tent, queuing for showers and questionable toilet facilities.

There is something spiritually uplifting about getting together with large numbers of brothers and sisters in Christ to celebrate our faith; there is the chance to be spiritually fed and uplifted in these big events that the smaller ones cannot provide: but will they make significant positive differences to my Christian walk and ministry?

I honestly don’t know.

What do you think?